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Diego Romero CEO Company
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Noelia Administración
Ester Asesoramiento
Andrea Olivera
Andrea Olivera Arquitecta

The question «How did your day go?»Can cause discord and misunderstanding in pairs. What will help partners feel that they are heard and understand?

When Stephen comes home from work, his wife Katie asks: “How did your day go, dear?»Further conversation is built like this.

– At the weekly meeting, the boss doubted my product knowledge and told the general to the director that I was incompetent. Hysteria!

– Here you start again. You take everything close to heart and accuse your boss. I saw her – quite sane. As you do not understand, she just worries about her department! (Association with the enemy.)

– Yes, she constantly clings to me.

– It’s just paranoia. Learn to control yourself. (Criticism.)

What do you think at that moment, Stephen feels that his wife loves him? Most likely no. Instead of becoming a reliable rear and listening to it, Katie only enhances tension.

Psychology Professor Neil Jacobson from the University of Washington conducted a study and found out: for marriage to be successful in the long run, you need to learn how to cope with external pressure and stress that arise outside your relationship.

A simple effective way for couples to replenish an account in a bank of emotions is to discuss how the day has passed. He has the name: «Conversation to relieve stress».

Many couples, like Stephen and Katie, are discussing

Jessica de 23 ans de Mississippi a rencontré un petit ami pendant plusieurs mois. À un moment donné, il lui admettait une vierge et veut attendre le mariage. «Et je me suis demandé si contactez Pharmacie-Erection des relations sexuelles? – elle dit. – Je suis fantasmagorique, parce que j’étais, mais je ne voulais pas me concentrer sur ceci. Surtout que les hommes peuvent faire n’importe quoi, mais sur les filles avec expérience, en particulier les croyants, ont l’air méprisamment. «

the past day, but this conversation does not help them relax. On the contrary, stress only increases: it seems to everyone that the other does not hear it. Therefore, you need to adhere to several rules.

Rule 1: Select the right moment

Some begin the conversation, barely crossing the threshold of the house. Others need to be a little alone before they are ready for dialogue. It is important to discuss this moment in advance. Set the time that suits you both. It can be fixed or floating: for example, every day at 7 pm or 10 minutes after you both come home.

Rule 2: Highlight more time

Some couples experience difficulties because they do not spend enough time together. This interferes with the development of love. Highlight the time to really get closer during the conversation: the conversation should occupy at least 20-30 minutes.

Rule 3: Do not discuss marriage

During the conversation, you can discuss everything that comes to mind, except for marriage and problems in relations. The conversation suggests an active hearing: while one pours the soul, the second listens to him with understanding, without condemning him. Since the issues discussed are not related to marriage, it is much easier to support a partner in his experiences and show that you understand him.

Rule 4: Take emotions

The conversation allows you to lose the load of irritation, get rid of the severity of large and small problems. If you are uncomfortable because the partner is sad, fear or anger, it’s time to find out why. Often discomfort is associated with the ban on the expression of negative emotions coming from childhood.

Do not forget about positive emotions. If you have achieved something important at work or in raising children, tell me about it. In life together, you need to share not only sorrows, but also joys. This is what gives the relationship the meaning.

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